Ramblings ...Again

Once again I've left my blog without words for far too long, at least for my liking, so now to get things caught up.  It's been a busy couple of weeks in the Swiftly Growing house and things don't look to be slowing down.

The step-son has kept us especially busy with band performances and Boy Scout duties.  He'll finish up middle school in the next couple of weeks and then be starting high school in the fall so I know this is only the beginning of the crazy schedule he'll be keeping.  While it's sometimes equal parts exhausting and exhausting I wouldn't change it.  I remember this time in my life and before we know it he'll be headed off to college and we'll miss the pace of our lives with constantly running him around.  Of course the slow pace will be short lived before our wee ones are requiring the Momma/Daddy taxi service.

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My niece, and Hubz's, Goddaughter, celebrated her 1st Communion last weekend. It made me smile with nostalgia and look forward to when I'm celebrating the same milestone with my wee ones.  It's funny how as a parent we start to look forward to things that we barely remember as kids but becoming a parent makes it all so much clearer.

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It's a big weekend for Baby Girl.  Tomorrow she'll be getting Baptized.  It's a little later than I would have liked but still earlier than her brother.  Maybe with the next baby I'll get it within that 3 month window.  Of course as is the case with big gatherings I'm not even close to ready.  Baby Girl has a chest cold or allergies or something so she's been a little clingy this week making it very difficult to get anything done.  Luckily today's my early day so I'll be running errands after work before picking up the kids and then doing tons of prep and cleaning tonite.  Tomorrow my day will start at 6 since I have to pick-up bagels and donuts and then get back to the house in time to get everyone up and dressed and out the door by 930.  I'll be ready for a nap with the lady of the hour by the time everyone leaves.

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Next weekend should be a nice slow weekend with nothing but yard work, my husband is a slave driver.  It'll all be worth it when our yard finally looks nice but just thinking about it makes me groan.  I wish we could just pay someone to do it, not that that would ever happen since Hubz has a love/hate relationship with yard work.  He hates it but doesn't want anyone else to do it because they won't do it right...I don't understand this.

Make it a great weekend.

Boston, oh Boston

Once again our country has been hit with a senseless act of violence with no explanation about why but plenty of questions. Today as runners were finishing the Boston Marathon, a run that many train a year for, a bomb went off, followed closely by a second. Police would later find at least two more that had not been detonated. As I'm writing this post 3 people have already died and countless others have been injured, some in critical condition.

As with the events of Sandy Hook I'm having problems processing how anyone could plan and carry out something so horrendous!? What brings someone to a point In their own lives where they think nothing about taking the lives of innocent people? I wonder if they thought about the countless lives their actions would affect and if they even hesitated for a moment.

My heart hurts thinking of his world I'm leaving to my kids, my nieces and nephews and future generations. I shed tears for the innocence that is lost every time something so senseless happens but the. I read something on face book that reminds that we are nation of survivors. That we as a nation don't take things lying down, we fight back and we lean on each other and these reminders they give me hope. Hope that just maybe it's all going to be okay not perfect but okay.

So to tonite as I'm nursing my baby girl to sleep I'll probably rock her a little longer and hold her a little closer but simply because before I know it she'll off into a world that isn't always kind but that always gets back up when it's pushed down. As I I'm reading a story to my little terror I'll hug and snuggle him a little longer but only because I know what's waiting for him.

Rest easy Bostonians you have an entire nation behind you. We weep for you, we pray for, we mourn for you and we fight for you. We are after all, "One Nation Under God."

5 Months - Baby Girl

Sweet Baby Girl

The time is just speeding by.  Here we are another month gone and you always changing and growing.  You're flipping, I don't really call in rolling since you can only go from your tummy to your back but I imagine any day now you'll be rolling all over the place.  Your brother, my first born and the bestest big brother, finally got you to laugh this week and he's the only one that's been able to get a laugh out of you.  It made my cry at first and now I laugh right along with you to crazy kiddos.  I've packed up your 0-3 month clothes, it seems like you were just wearing them and they were too big but it really has been 5 months.  You're quite the vocalizer these days cooing and babbling, Momma loves it!  You're still not the greatest sleeper but like your brother I know it'll happen, eventually ... I hope and if you don't figure it out on your own, in the next 7 months, I'll help you figure out after that.

At the end of the month you'll be Baptized and while I know you don't know what it means right now you'll understand the importance when you're older.  For me it reminds me of the incredible responsibility I have to not only raise you to be a caring, compassionate, accepting person but also to teach you to believe in something bigger than you or me.  It's a daunting task really but one I'm confident that God will lead me through, he did after all give me the blessing of making me your Momma so he must have faith that I can do it.

My sweet, sweet girl in the next month you will celebrate your half-birthday.  And we'll be on the down hill slide to your first birthday.  I can't believe how fast it's flying by.  I know you won't remember these 12 months but for me they'll be some of my best memories because I spent them watching you grow and change.  In the grand scheme of things these 5 months have been but a blip in the movie of your life but oh how amazing those little blips have been.

I love you my sweet girl.

Forever & Always,
Momma

Ramblings ...

I keep telling my self that I'm going to get better about blogging, then my life overwhelms me again and well 3 weeks go by before I find time to blog.  It kind of makes me sad because this is supposed to be my place to get my thoughts out and chronicle my kids lives and my life but the one thing I want to be sure to have memories of is the one thing that keeps me from doing it.  It's a vicious cycle really.

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I found a new blog several months ago that speaks to my heart, Momastry.  Glennon, the writer, has a way with words that brings tears to my eyes and shaking my head in complete agreement with everything she says.  She hasn't had an easy life and she's completely upfront about that but she also knows that God, her faith in something bigger than us, is what guides her and leads her and allows her continue to try.  Like I said she speaks to my heart.

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The Bean is in full blown terrible twos and most days I just don't handle it well.  There's too much yelling, by us both, and not enough laughing and just being.  I'm trying to get a handle on it and just when I think I do, I realize I don't.  I'm trying to remember that this stage is normal, I even read an article that said so, but oh how it trys my already frazzled nerves.  Luckily I know everyday is another day to do better, for both of us.

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Sweet baby girl is still sweet and cute and I'm cherishing every minute.  As crazy as it sounds I'm sad that we won't be ready for #3 as soon as I would like but that just means she gets to be my baby a little longer.  She recently started flipping from her tummy to her back.  At first she was not happy about it but now she's all smiles and coos after she does it, she's so proud of herself.  She's on the verge of starting to laugh as well, I can't wait to see what things really get her going.  I can't believe she'll be 5 months in a couple of weeks. 

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In June Hubz and I will be together for 10 years!  It's crazy that it seems like forever and not forever all at the same time.  I was hoping to pull something special together for us but with an impending furlough, a car that it appears it may need a new transmission, summer camp for the step-son and bills that's highly unlikely to happen. Why is that to the two most inconvenient, money sucking things always wind up to happen at the same time?  We're hoping the warranty we got with the car will cover most if not all of the transmission problem but to be honest I'm not hopeful just because that's our life and when it rains it pours.

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So there's my ramblings and goings on for the last three weeks.  I really am going to try and be better, although I'm not sure why I'm worried about it since I don't really have any followers.  Of course with the broken transmission comes me being the one that gets to do Daycare drop off and pick-up...HOORAY! Not really since that also means not rest for the weary, or the Momma, since the Hubz basically won't have to do anything on weekdays except sleep in and get home late, which is what he does now anyway.  It only sucks a little.

Happy Monday!  Don't let anyone fool ya, it is after all April Fools.

Give Me Back My Hour

Daylight savings robbed me of an hour this week and it completely showed in my Mommaness.  This week I was a bad Momma.  I was short tempered, cranky and yelled more than I'd like to admit.  It's a good thing I don't strive to be perfect otherwise I'd probably be in a corner somewhere. 

My kids, eh, they were barely affected by the time change but between waking every 3-4 hours with Miss Lady and that loss of an hour it took me until Friday to get my bearings, even with coffee.  It makes me angry and sad with myself that I let something like the loss of an hour affect me like that but what's done is done and I just have to move on with it.

Now it's the weekend and we've got great things planned.  Like dinner with my sisters and their families, poker for the hubz with his brother and friends and some QT time with my sisters-in-laws. I refuse to let the bad week put me in a bad place so I'm focusing on the good that did happen and that's that my kids now I love them and they're still a live.

Happy weekend.

4 Months - Baby Girl

I wish I could understand how you're already 4 months! Everyday is a new adventure. You're so very different from your brother at this age which I guess is to be expected since you are two totally different little people. You're growing and changing every day and just like with your brother I stand in awe.

You absolutely love tummy time and have been sleeping on your belly since you were about 2 months old. You hat to be on your back, even when you're getting your diaper changed, unless someone is talking to you. Oh my word how you love o be talks to. You're guaranteed to smile if someone is talking to you.

You just recently discovered your tongue and your always sticking it out. It's so cute because it's so little. I suspect part of the reason for the sudden tongue sticking out is because you may be starting teeth, although if you're anything like your brother it'll be a while before teeth finally make an appearance.

You have your 4 month appointment tomorrow and I can't wait to see how much you've grown from two months ago, I know I'd a lot! It'll be interesting to see how you compare to your brother at this age. I can already tell you're not as long as he was but it's hard to say with the weight. The way you eat I wouldn't be surprised if you're bigger than he was but I'm hopeful it'll all even out in the end, I'd rather you have Daddy's family height than mine it makes it much easier buying clothes.

Baby girl these last four months have just flown by and while I would never wish any of this time away I can't wait to see what the next months hold for you, I do hope one of your developments is going to bed easier!

Momma loves you sweet girl!

Two and half

I think I blinked!  That's what I think every time I look at the Bean.  I mean that's really the only explanation I can come up with for why he's already 2.5 years old.  To me it defy's reason that this little person that we wished and prayed for and then who grew inside of me for 8.5 months is now this walking, talking, riot of a little boy.  Always moving, always talking never still except for when he's sleeping. 

He knows all his letters, can count to 12 and is starting to recognize sight words.  Of course I can't take all the credit, heck I can barely take half of the credit.  He's super smart and has a GREAT daycare provider, so glad she's part of our village,  who works with him during the week. The things he knows changes every day and sometimes it makes me stop, I'm just in such awe of this little man that came from me.

I worried when when we found out we were expecting baby girl about how he would adjust but there really wasn't any reason to.  He's such a laid back kid that he kind of just went with the flow, like welcoming this new little person was no big deal. Not to mention how much he loves her.  He asks for her first thing in the morning and always wants to know if she's okay when she's crying.  However, he also thinks she's his own personal pillow and loves to share her baby seats, you can probably imagine how well that works out.

At 2.5 we've started tackling the headache that is potty training, and really headache is an understatement. I know that it will come in time but since Momma is not the most patient I wish it would come faster than it is.  Some days all I want to do is sit in a corner and drink wine I'm so frustrated by the slowness of this whole process but I know that just like everything else he'll catch on, everyday is better than the last so I'm confident we'll be done with diapers before he turns 3.

I can't help but wonder what the next 6 months bring and we slowly inch closer to him starting school, which just the though brings tears to my eyes. It's all part of being a Momma though, isn't it?  Watching your babies grow and changing, helping to shape the person they'll become but knowing that in the end their story is theirs to tell and we're simply just the narrator.  I love narrating his story and can't wait to see what the rest of his story will be!

Happy Half-Birthday sweet boy!  I love you forever & always.