Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Tired

I'm tired, physically, mentally and emotionally. I'm in this funk that I can't pull myself out of and the only reason I don't spend everyday in bed after work is because I have a beautiful little Bean to take care of.  I'm pretty sure it's not PPD because first of all it's just all of a sudden (which doesn't necessarily mean anything) and second of all I'm pretty sure I know the root of the problem.  However, I don't know how to go about fixing it. I can talk and yell until I'm blue in the face but nothing ever changes.  It's still the same shite day in and day out and I'm just tired.  I realize that life's never what you expect, what's that saying about telling God your plans?, but it seems to me there are just several universal things that one wants out of life:  To be happy, healthy, wealthy and wise.  1 out of 4 is not good, that's 25%, less than average.  So how do I go about getting at least two more of these, the wise I think just comes with age.

I'm not a fighter, I refuse to scream and argue, I want to have an adult conversation.  But how do you do that when the other party doesn't hear anything you say?

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