Joe Pa

Over the weekend a legend died, Joe Paterno, and once again my disappointment in the human race proved to be founded. As a whole all I saw was hatred for a man that most didn't know personally and only chose to remember for a wrong they believed he committed, not any law enforcement, just people.  And this got me wondering when exactly did everyone decide that it was their place to judge a man on the acts of his life, but disregard all the good he did for one bad decision, which for the record he did what he should have telling his superiors and had no control over how they handled the situation.  Could he have done more, hell yes, but the fact still remains that he did what he should have.  And now people sit judging a man that probably judged himself way harsher then anyone could have until his dying day.  And so today I still sit with a heavy heart for the Paterno family because a wife lost her soul mate, children lost their father and grandchild lost their grandfather.  And really when it comes down to it a man died and his judgement will be done by the Man that matters not any of those people that like to throw stones ... I mean because really the man was just human, just like we all are

Random

I've got thoughts swirling in my head due to somethings going on at home but I can't find the words to put them down on paper so until I can all I have are some randomness that is my life.  Like the fact that I was paying some bills today, it's payday and being a grown-up sucks on payday, when I saw that we only have 27 years and 8 months left on our mortgage ... YES!   Or that I hate my neighbor, and I don't use the word hate lightly, the woman is a busy body and cannot mind her own damn business. Did I mention I'm going to see Breaking Dawn Saturday morning?  SO EXCITED! 

Speaking of Saturday I have a jam packed day with a  pee wee football championship game for one nephew and a first birthday party for my youngest nephew, it's going to be a weekend full of family and I can't wait.

Here's hoping I can work out the words swirling into my head for tomorrow.

Ramblings...

3-years after being told I was going to get a promotion if finally happened! And at a perfect time, what with both boys having birthdays this month and our Anniversary, 4-years, next month.  The extra money is definitely being put to good use as we pay off one car next month and the other by the beginning of next summer, ya know before we have to buy a bigger family car.

Speaking of bigger family car.  I keep waffling on when we should start trying for our newest little bundle.  We said February and really we can't afford it much before then, remember the two cars I just mentioned, but I'm ready!  Actually I've been ready since the Bean was 9 months.  It probably helps that he's finally sleeping through the nite. Of course it's only been a week and now that I've said that I'm sure I've jinxed it.

I still need to do a post about the Bean's birthday party but since I didn't get a lot of pictures I'm waiting on everyone to get theirs uploaded so I can steal them.  On the topic of pictures I'm having the hardest time deciding which ones I want to buy from his Cake Smash session there's SO many.  I'm giving myself a deadline to make a decision by the beginning of next month so we can get some hung up around the house, I still have to pick ones from the boys spring session too.  I'm such a slacker.

I'm so glad it's Friday.  We have a busy weekend, which is par for the course during September, but it's going to be spend with some of my favorite people so I'm not too upset.  We don't really have a break until November, crazy I know.

TGIF!

Random

My thoughts have been a jumble lately so this post in my attempt to get them out then maybe I can get them organized.

1. Why do I feel the need to have control of everything in my life and but not really be in control? My house is a mess, I have two dogs, a 9 y/o step-son and a husband that's like a child. Getting control of my life is just not an option if I have no support. I feel like I'm drowning and I just continue to get in further above my head.

2. Sometimes I wonder if I should see a shrink. I often wonder if I suffer from depression or something b/c while I'm no always sad I'm never truly happy. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I'm not where I thought I'd be at 8 days shy of 27. I was suppose to be finished with law school, working 50 hour weeks, married and enjoying being a newlywed. I guess it all goes back to #1 and my lack of control in my life.

3. I've been a member of my current church for as long as I've lived in VA, so 16 years almost, but recently I've been very unhappy with it. I'm thinking about changing churches and it scares me.

4. I want a baby like yesterday but b/c of my need to control things and the fact that we have so much debt this won't be happening for a least another year. I never thought I'd have kids and now....I sure could use that money tree.

5. I hate my job, not the people I work with (although I do have a strong dislike for one and am aggevated often by another). I wish I could be a professional wedding planner, but this just isn't realistic so I suffer through.

6. I wish that all the wonderful ladies I had in my life 5 years ago in college were closer, especially April, Cheronda, Linds, Sarah and Brooke. 5 very different ladies that I all helped me not only survive college but enjoy it. I talk to the first four every once in a while, but not nearly enough. Unfortunately Brooke and I have kind of lost touch. She's busy with her new life and I'm happy for her but I wish I could be a part of it just a little.

7. HOORAY!!! We finally have heat.

What a downer post! I'll try to come up with happy thoughts for later.